Retreat

I need to go I am going to go soon.

                        not of my body

                                           but of my life

 beginning

not from my body
but of my arms
a daughter
in my heart
               new mother
a role played out

my body curled in time
my heart  dried crisp
black wing desire for life
of my own way
not child  home    husband

hate in her body?
repair possible in that heart?
45 year old narsacistic need
a dam in her heart
places daggers in mine

               not of my body
               other’s life patterns
past genes lines
differences of mental variations


not of my body, but of my mind
we hate,  we love?
my heart of my body
beats heavy, erratic
taunted by this puzzle